Tuesday, June 8, 2010

The Words Craig Would Say

Be strong in the Lord. You always were. It’s what drew me to you when I first met you and it was always the thing that kept pulling me back. You are a woman of God first.

Ok, fine… you were right about the car. I grovel at your feet.

Never give up hope. I know you want to and I know you don’t think any of this is worth it, but it is. You’ll see. For now, just trust me.

I know you’re hurt and I know you’re mad. But for heaven’s sake, please stop taking it out on the lawn. I worked hard on that thing!

No more being afraid. God’s hand is on you and so is mine. I told you a thousand times you worry too much and now you know that worrying can’t stop anything. I want you to be happy but in order to do that you have to let go of that fear. It’s ok, I’m still here, you can let it go.

No, it didn’t hurt. It really was too quick.

Quit swearing so much. I thought it was cute but not everybody has the same appreciation for your potty mouth that I did.

Sorry about the filing system. I know you hate it when you can’t find stuff. On the plus side, now you can finally redo it and I won’t be mad!

Forgive and forget. Remember, Jesus said seventy times seven. And I’m sorry but it will probably take that many times for this.

Have mercy on the people I cared about. Remember, I was where they are once too. And you fought for me so please don’t stop fighting for them because I can’t anymore.

I always did love your hair like that.

Take your time and pray. God hasn’t forgotten you. I know you keep asking for that telephone to heaven and guess what - you already have it. He’s here to listen and He misses you too.

Stop going back to the accident site. I’m not there anymore. It’s just hurting you more. And you know how I hate to see you hurting.

Tell everyone to stop sitting in my damn chair. It took me forever to get the butt groove just right. Well, maybe you can sit in it. See how much I love you, Sal?

You changed my whole life and got me to where I am now. Stop beating yourself up about all the little things along the way. The one thing that mattered you never gave up on. And I’m glad.

Every time you forget, just read those letters. That’s why I wrote every single one of them for you.

Bet you are glad we got that dishwasher now, eh? Told you I was doing most of the housework.

I’m so proud of you. Keep making me proud.

Don’t forget why you are here. Don’t take your eyes off where you are headed or you will end up somewhere else. Stay focused.

I already know you’re going to do great things and that God has a plan for you. This is all just part of it. Hang on, there is more, and I promise this next part will be great.

I lied. I really do love your wailing. I mean singing. You don’t have to turn the radio up to drown it out anymore.

I’m so sorry about the letter. If I had known this would happen, I’d have thrown it out instead of just trying to hide it from you. Don’t let this undo everything else.

I’m sorry about the life insurance and the job and the shift work. I really tried my best. I wish I could have left you with something more and that I had more time with you while I was still there.

You know what I want you to do, I already told you. Stop letting everyone else pull you in a million different directions. You are my wife. And I trusted you with everything for a reason. So you need to start trusting you too.

Please start smiling again. I miss seeing your smile. The one that starts with your eyes.

That tattoo? YES. Do it! Ha! I told you you’d get inked for me one day…

I don’t know where your passport is either. So please quit yelling at me that it’s my fault. You’re scaring the neighbors.

Don’t worry about living a life of significance. You already have. You were significant to me.

I miss you. Wish you were here. This place is great. Even better than we thought. Like Maui on steroids. Can’t wait ‘til you get here.

When I said goodbye, what I really meant was ‘I love you’. But you already know that.


  1. Absolutely Beautiful!

    The truth rings out loud and clear!
    I love you sister!

  2. I can totally picture Craig saying all of it! I'm glad you remember it all so well.
    I love you Emily:)
    P.s: The dishwasher thing is hilarious!
    p.P.s: I'm sure that's why tattoo's were invented....but just know it would be impossible to forget Craig you don't need a tattoo to remember him. But hey what the heck right!? You know you want one!

    Lydia xoxoxoxo